Örümcek lives on an island,
In the Mediterranean Sea.
A spider of monstrous proportions,
Who eats bad little boys for his tea.
There he waits all day long for the time,
When the children have all gone to sleep,
Then he pulls on his eight-legged frog suit,
And wades his way into the deep.
At the galleon wreck near the rocks,
He gathers his octopus friends.
And together they head for the shore,
To the shelf where the creaky pier ends.
And they wait and they watch and they loiter,
While the hubbub quietens down
Then they climb out onto the shingles,
And make their way into the town.
The pavements there offer no problems,
For the over-size eight-legged creepers.
As they look for the best means of entry,
To capture the mischievous sleepers.
They simply examine the doorways,
For suitably large letter slots,
Or drop into unguarded living rooms,
By climbing down old chimney pots.
But while getting in is quite easy,
It’s the egress that causes the stress.
Squeezing children out of small crannies,
Can leave behind tell-tale mess.
Far better says octopoid wisdom,
To devour them while still in their beds,
And prevent the ensuing screaming,
By swiftly consuming their heads.
Then after the gulping ingestion,
They hide there in wait ‘til near dawn.
Safe and snug under the blankets,
While they wait for their food to go down.
But at first hinting of sunlight,
It’s back up the chimney they go,
They squeeze their way out of the letter box,
Or push through an open window.
And at Örümcek’s secretive sign,
They make their way back to the foam,
They drag themselves over the shingles,
And back to their watery home.
At seven the town begins screaming,
“The children are gone from their beds!”
(Some appear to be lying there still,
But admittedly, missing their heads).
Then the grapevine whispers of paedos,
And the internet takes all the blame,
But no one looks out to the ocean,
To the place whence the creatures all came.
And back over the sea on his island,
Örümcek’s waits in his cave,
For the time to feast once again,
On little boys who just won’t behave.