Fuck the sun…

20130215134222!Southern-belle-civil-warIt’s so hard to write and to think deeply with Katrina and the Waves blaring out on the pub playlist. I am not particularly miserable at the moment, but neither am I ‘Walking on Sunshine‘. In fact, I resent this song for the simple reason that I have never ever been as happy as she sounds when she sings this song.

I didn’t even like sunshine at all for many years; even on holiday I’d try to avoid it. It simply didn’t make me happy. While everyone else was in shorts and keen to get a tan, I’d cover myself up, walking around as pallid as a Southern Belle, obviously, of course, minus the charm and the inheritance.

“Oh me, oh my Mr Butler, why I simply can not abide this blazing Norfolk sun!” I would say while fanning myself.

It’s OK now though, ‘Loser‘ by Beck has just come on and restored my mood.

Today I am Dr. Gachet…

Dr_Gachet

“I’ve done the portrait of Mr Gachet with an expression of melancholy which might often appear to be a grimace to those looking at the canvas. And yet that’s what should be painted, because then one can realize, compared to the calm ancient portraits, how much expression there is in our present-day heads, and passion and something like waiting and a shout. Sad but gentle but clear and intelligent, that’s how many portraits should be done, that would still have a certain effect on people at times.”

Vincent van Gogh